Friday, June 5, 2009

The Perils of a Workin' Momma!

OK - so I am mostly writing this to get some feedback from moms out there because I am hoping I am not the only one who feels this way. So I went back to work 4 weeks ago (I can't believe it's been that long!) and at first everything was fine...didn't cry my eyes out the first day back (first step in the right direction!) and actually started feeling a little guilty because I enjoyed being back. Now, only four weeks later, I almost cry everytime I drop her off and I can't stop thinking about her all day long and how I feel like I am missing out on the things she is doing. We're still having some tummy troubles, so her feeding times are still a challenge and I always feel like "if I were just at home with her all day it would be better." Then, when I'm at work I feel like I'm not there enough (now that I'm part time - 3 1/2 days a week) to really get things done and I feel "out of the loop" most of the time. I'm so used to giving everything I do 110% that it's hard juggling two important areas of my life. AAHH! I'm assuming this is normal, but I just need some encouragement that I'm not crazy! We really can't afford for me to quit work and honestly, I went to school for a very long time to do this so I don't really want to give it up either. Guilt if you stay home, guilt if you work all the time. I'm trying so hard to stop worrying and give it to God because I know only He can give me the true encouragement I need and strength to get through each day. Just know if you are going through the same thing, I TOTALLY understand and am here if you need me - it's not easy being a working mommy! Love you guys!

3 comments:

Leslie Davis Reynolds said...

Kristen,

I have been exactly where you are, and honestly even though Cooper is almost 4 there are still days that I drop him off and think to myself, "I wish I could just stay home with him today." However, I have finally come to the realization that I am blessed to have the best of both worlds. I have a job that I love AND when I am home with the kids they get my full undivided attention. For me personally, I feel like because I do work I cherish the time that I spend with the kids so much more. I promise that the balancing act gets easier with time and God's guidance. Good Luck and I will be praying for you!

Zach, Kate, Odin and Grey Osborn said...

You are normal, I promise. Odin is going through a Daddy phase right now and that makes it even harder to believe that I am doing the right thing by working. Zach has to drop him off, so I am saved from that, but he also gets to pick him up every day and have that little guy get excited to see him walk in the door and crawl as fast as he can to his daddy. It seems like the rare days I get to pick him up, he is sleeping when I get there and pissed 'cause someone woke him up (he wakes up like his mommy). So, yes, you are normal and it will seem easier at times and other times it will suck. Babies go through phases, and so do their mommies. (Daddies kinda do too). Yea for 3 1/2 days, I'm up to 5 now. Love ya kiddo.

The Whitesell's said...

I'd say you are a perfectly normal workin' momma. It IS very challenging. Reese is 8 months old now and I still think about her non-stop all day long. She is usually only up for about 15 minutes in the morning before I have to leave for work and I have to drag myself away because I just want to stay home and love on her all day. But, you just have to remember that you only work 3.5 days a week and Addison probably naps about half the time you are gone so you are not missing as much as you think you are. Plus, like Leslie said, I think it does make you cherish the time you have with her so much more. Hang in there. You are a great Momma and you have nothing to feel guilty about.